Flowers from the hospice symposium yesterday
I am learning to walk past it without having the temptation -
or the desire - even a thought "lurking" in my mind.
That is the hardest part.
The behaviour - I got.
The attitude change is a little incomplete.
There are still some moments of temptation. But less than before.
It's the inconsistency I am looking to correct.
And the lack of integrity between my thoughts and my behaviour.
That seems to be something that needs "healing" (time?)
More than correction. If I could "fix"myself,
presumably I would have never gotten off course,
or stayed off course in the first place.
Will I always have cravings? Maybe.
Do I have to give in to them? Never.
Will I mess up and give in? Yes.
Can I get right back on track?
Oh yes - definitely!
Dude, where's the elevator?
A picturesque scene,
modernized with lots of underground parking!
Me and Baby - that's her name.... my Mac!
(She says "hi," by the way)
Set up my little corner and took lots of pics!
Sure hope they can find a couple of good ones
to use for the local nursing magazine.
The Lab Coat Test
Didn't get to wear it....but it did fit
With only a slight BeDonkeyDonk going on.
I'm just glad it could close in front!
Visceral fat (link) is different than skeletal muscle fat, it seems.
So I've changed my LoCarb approach. Now I eat much much less fat.
Much much much less. Did I mention that already?
So now I have hunger for the first time (other than fasting.)
I have two protein shakes a day. Then one meal at home.
And lots of water. No daily snacks/ treats.
Unless Advil counts as a treat!
There are days I question the value of my very existence
with out treats. You might as well tell a child that there is no Santa.
Wah! - Sez me!
Some days, the forbidden foods occupy my every thought.
And I get into all kinds of goofy dialoges in my head:
Sooooo.... all my life, I never get a treat?
For the rest of my life?
Never even one? Right! That's freaking genius.
Sooooo... do I really need to put forth all this effort
to reach a goal that I really don't want to reach?
If it's this hard will I be able to maintain it?
Will it require all my energy to keep my thoughts controlled?
Que the Drama!
Boolean Logic - is like"if/then"
It is a sign (for me) of The Crazy Brain /ego
talk, because "IF" is always in the future.
And the future hasn't existed yet. (By definition.)
IF I get hungry...
IF I go mad from want of chocolate...
IF I fail...
IF I succeed...
If something happened - other than this - I would finally be happy!
Now I see the error of my thinking.
Remembering, of course,
that error is a call for correction, not punishment.
Finally I am starting my true weight-loss journey.
Getting ready for pre-maintenence.
Everything up till now was just form. The "how."
Now I am into the content. The "why."
It's like the difference between just playing notes on a piano,
(even though the notes were accurate)
and playing a beautiful song.
One is theory.
The other just "typing."
Hope your weekend is shaping up to be great!