Beethoven for the boids
Every size and shape of pumpkin and gourd
At a GMO stand near you
"You-Know-What" is the word [mum]
Somehow, not so comforting
when they are towing your car away....
I feel a certain distance from things that I once loved.
And I feel closer to myself somehow.
Maybe even private, or just determined - motivated ...
It's good, what-ever it is. It's just new to me.
I'm not angry. It's not the "angry" kind of motivation.
And I'm not shy or afraid. Like I had been lately.
I want to lose the anxiety as much as I want to lose the weight!
The anxiety and the self-doubt... rejection.
That must change, regardless of what my weight is.
I have no intention of doing this weight-loss thing again.
Never - Ever. In my life.
I have no intention of staying past 2 years total in this modality.
As a person who is or was heavy. Dieting.
Two years to lose (what some have guessed will be)
close to 100 pounds, when it's all said and done.
That's about right... about a pound a week, x 2 years.
Then, maintenance.
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Breakfast: Egg white protein w/coffee
Lunch: Whey protein w/sugar-free ginger ale
Come closer, my pretties.... look at this green salad!
Dinner: Salad w/cheese, cauliflower, hard-boiled eggs,
onions, cranberries, walnuts, Catalina and Green Goddess dressing.
Snack: Pistachio nuts - different flavors!
Water: about 1/2 gallon - or more - as the day went by
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Hope your "coming out" day doesn't leave you
with reasons to want to "go back in!"
Hope your "coming out" day doesn't leave you
with reasons to want to "go back in!"
Would it be wrong to want a hug from you ? Enjoy the day
ReplyDeleteI like it that you are aware of the transformation within you, not an angry motivation.
ReplyDeleteThose are words of a peacemaker. I'm right behind Allan for a hug :)
ReplyDelete"And I'm not shy or afraid. Like I had been lately.
ReplyDeleteI want to lose the anxiety as much as I want to lose the weight!
The anxiety and the self-doubt... rejection.
That must change, regardless of what my weight is."
This spoke to me Anne, I feel the same way. The anxiety I really believe is what kept the weight on me for so long. Boy I'm glad I found you, your words mean a lot to me.
Hi Anne,
ReplyDeleteI am nominating you and your blog for a Blog of Substance award. I know it is a little over the top since you already have received this I am sure. I just could not bear to post a list of Blogs with Substance and not include yours. Accepting this award is voluntary. Read more about this particular award and what I have to say about your blog at:
http://ruminationsasiuncoverthewomanwithin.blogspot.com/
Michele
I've never actually wanted to meet a blogger in person, until now. You have such a beautiful perspective on life, on change, on being.
ReplyDeleteThanks for another awe-inspiring post!
-Robin
I agree with Robin, you do have a beautiful perspective on life. I love the before and after pictures...look at that skinny little bum of yours :)
ReplyDeleteYour bird comment and mum comment had me cracking up this morning. Thanks. What a yummy looking salad, Anne. Yum, yum, I want some.
You are a very insightful lady.
ReplyDeleteI too am changing the way I feel about myself, it's like relearning who this thinner person is, what does she like? what is she comfortable in or not in? I spent soo many years just being uncomfortable in situations, clothes, with people because I was so OBSESSED with my weight, an embarrassing admission of narcissism
I like not feeling that way
I'm lining up for a hug too.
ReplyDeleteWhat a thought provoking post, Anne.
ReplyDeleteI especially liked:
"I have no intention of staying past 2 years total in this modality.
As a person who is or was heavy. Dieting. "
It made me realize that yes, right now my identity IS that of a person losing weight... a former very large person... learning to be "normal"... changing... finding the Real Me... lots of that kind of stuff.
But your post reminded me of what Mary did, from Wistful Nebulae. She used to have a "weight loss" blog. But after a couple years of having lost around 100 lbs, and maintaining, she closed it and opened her Writers blog. She wanted to focus on her new identity, and not be forever "labeled". To BE that new person, to live that new life.
That's what your post reminded me of... and now I wonder about myself and MY future... what nice musings your post brought forth... THANK YOU!
Loretta
=^..^=
What can I say? Love the before-and-after photos, the around town photos and the salad photo. Reading about your personal growth is lovely as well. Good to see. All of it.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful salad! I wish I could say after two years I would be done with dieting- but after two years I'm almost half way there. :)
ReplyDeleteHugs to everyone! Yay!
ReplyDeleteHi Anne, My heart feels really happy for you. This was a wonderful and uplifting post. I'm so proud of you and your accomplishments. High five!
ReplyDeletexo jj
PS I'm off to NYC and will be back next week. I'll check in if I find Internet access.