20 May 2010

fat cats ♪ the musical ♫

The Musical
Weigh, Way, Weigh Off BROAD Weigh!

The Jelly-filled cats meet once a year -
And tonight's the night!

Mac Calorie: The Mystery Cat

Mac Calorie's a mystery fat, he's called the hidden flaw
For he's a master criminal who can defy the law
He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair
For when they reach their dinner time, 
Mac Calorie's not there! 

Mac CalorieMac Calorie, there's no one like Mac Calorie
He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity
His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare
And when you reach your BMI, 
Mac Calorie's not there! 

You may seek him in a point, you may say you eat thin air,
But I tell you once and once again, 
Mac Calorie's not there! 

Mac Calorie's a ginger (snap) cat, he's very tall and thin
You would know him if you saw him for his face is sunken in
His brow is deeply lined in thought, his head is highly domed
His coat is dusty from neglect, his whiskers are uncombed

He sways his head from side to side with movements like a snake
And when you think he's half asleep, he's always wide awake! 

Mac CalorieMac Calorie, there's no one like Mac Calorie
He's a fiend in fatty shape, a monster of depravity
You may meet him in some ice cream, or in a chocolate square
But when a plate's discovered, then 
Mac Calorie's not there! 

He's outwardly respectable - 
I know - he cheats at carbs!
And his butt prints are not found in any file of Scotland Yard's
And when the larder's looted, or the pie case has been rifled,
Or when the milk is missing, or another pig's been stifled
Or the greenhouse gas is broken, and the scale's past repair
Ay, there's the wonder of the thing
Mac Calorie's not there!
YouTube video

Skinny Shanks
The railway cat who is a thin as a rail!

Bustin' out and Jonesing

Ben-'n-Jerry AND Rump-li'l-Teaser

Grizzle Belly
also sings the greatest-tit "Mammories"

Mr Pounds-Off-Of-Me

You ought to ask Mr Pounds-Off-Of-Me
The original conjuring cat!
The greatest dieticians have something to learn
From Mister 
Pounds-Off-Of-Me's conjuring turn 
And we all say
Oh! Well a-never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mister

Down Down Down 
Past the HeavySide Layer!

I love Andrew Lloyd Webber!
And I love Cats!
This just came to me on the way to class today.
I must think of  my new life and I mustn't give in!
When the dawn comes, tonight will be a memory, too
Let a new day begin! Please?


  1. OMG...I will not eat those strange dried mushrooms I found in the field ever again.

  2. This is so awesome! You are so talented! I love Cats, too. I had a cat named Tugger (he died a couple of years ago at the age of 18) as in Rum-Tum Tugger.

  3. I've always wanted to see cat's!

  4. when the dawn comes, tonight wont even be a memory...xoxoxoxo

  5. Winnie - thanks!
    Let that day be today, then.

    What's next - Jupiter loses a stripe?
    Much less jovial about that one, eh?

    Goodnight, then, kittens!

  6. I have a hard time with temptation. I like food. I have to get through a day at a time.

  7. You are so clever Anne! I loved Cats...I saw it millions of years ago. Thanks for the "mammories!"

  8. LOL Lurves it! I saw Cats on Broadway when I lived in NYC one upon a time. It was magical.

    My friend and I rewrote the musical, Shrubberies. I believe it went something like ... Shrubberies. All alone in the moonlight. Oh no, here comes a big doggie wanting to wee.

    Yeah, the original is better. :D And, so is your version.

  9. It's been years since I've seen "Cats" but what a fabulous show! Your version looks equally as good :-)

    Hang in there-- One day at a time Anne.


  10. This is great. I am a fan of Cats too...:-)

  11. me interesting?! crazy! you're the one taking rides in hot air balloons and going to watch gaga-esque drag queens perform!

  12. I love the songs you have up! You are very creative with words and images! :o)


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