one day more (again)

Working like this is like

Swimming from one ice hole

To another. All in one pass. 

If you mess up, it’s bad. 

You can’t resurface till the other side. 

Instead of ordering out, 

I’ve really tightened up and 

And am almost a miser

After that mega hack I had last week. 

This will indeed be me. 

But I’ll have my skin. 

Nice healing soup. 

I’m 100% better… well… 99% really. 

Modern Nursing Still Life. 

Advil. Monsters. Covefe. 

Hand Sanitizer, masks, 

And hourly temperature checks. 

No food? No problem. 

Give your guts a break.  

The mat I sleep on here is on the floor. 

It sucks getting up and down from the floor. 

Nothing to grab onto. 

In Nursing, that’s called being a

“Furniture Walker.”  Meaning

The person has to hold on things

To walk. And can’t get up from a chair

Without holding on to something. 

Hold on to a chair. Or the potty! 

It’s a definite sign of decline. 

Fight against this! 

Remember on Grace and Frankie

She got stuck on the toilet! 

I suppose my work load 

Is proof of healing. 

Metabolic and immune system healing. 

100 hours a week is not for the weak. 

[Gosh- I’m cleverer- lol!]

An odd selfie. In total darkness 

What a crazy good camera Apple makes. 

They say it also acts as a phone! 

jocularity

Breakfast. 

Lunch 

Dinner. 

The last time I got GrubHub

The meal was so nasty- it looked like

A drunk toddler made it. 

And it was like $30! 

I told myself I would be 

Better off fasting. 

I was right! 

Kid is sick. 

Mom brings in humidifier. 

Night Nurse said it was stuffy in the room. 

And opened the window. 

“But the humidifier seemed to help.”

Alas! Alack! Alaska! 

That’s what I’m trained myself to say

Instead of  saying

“OMG! You must be batshit crazy!”

I just hope it’s not contagious. 

Once upon a time 

In Nurse Land, there was a great magazine 

Called the Journal of Nursing Jocularity 

You can’t change things. 

You might as well giggle.  

They stopped producing this 

Industry Standard when the leaders

Were killed in a wreck. (Link)

I miss the spirit of those days. 

The irony is that here we are

The most advanced 

The most powerful 

All-American Apex Predator!

Our medical knowledge is amazing

And yet- the infrastructure is lacking. 

We suck at delivery. 

All work and no play

Makes for a dull day. 

This is consecutive day 11. 

One day more for a day off. 

I’m going to sleep. 

Nothing but sleep. 

At least still have my wits. 

Don’t leave home without your wits! 

ETA

 Check out the Flying Trapeze

From It Happened One Night 

Link

eminem

I sure do love Eminem. 

The American rapper. 

I’ve loved him since first blush. 

I’ve blogged about him before. (Link)

Since 1999?  His music hits just right. 

He’s gifted. 

He also had weight issues. 

Drug issues. 

Look at him now. 

He raps about his recovery and sobriety. 

Cleaning out my closet. 

The Patron Saint of 

White lower middle class 

Kids everywhere. 

I’m glad he escaped poverty. 

But fame has its own monsters. 

My nephew and I loved Em 

Paul never got past his own angst. 

We used to drive around 

- For literally hours -

Listening to Eminem. 

In my life, 3 people (that I know of)

Killed themselves, and each of them

Called me immediately beforehand. 

But in each case I could not 

Get to them in time. 

None of them were my responsibility. 

 None of them were especially close. 

Paul, my nephew, (like a brother)

Hadn’t been around for months.  

Just called. No answer. No talk. 

Ring. Boom. Train. 

Ring. Boom. Rope. 

Ring. Boom. Shot. 

Three suicides. One murder. 

Why? Why? My god. Why?

Someone out there kept my number

And reached out. 4 times. 

I’m no Superman. 

(Quoting Slim Shady)

There are some things 

we just can’t control. 

And that’s just destiny. 

Never was. 

My place for the next 3 days. 

Nice, safe, warm place to crash. 

I’m still having one Monster

And one shake a day. 

I had a bite of a pizza cheese. 

Got sick as a dog. 

Tomato paste, bread, seed oils,

Heartburn and inflammation. 

rose glow

Neighborhood sunrise. 

The sky was yellow gold. 

The tops of the trees were like magic. 

Siri didn’t do this justice. 

Prepped the food for 6 cat meals. 

I’ll be gone for a few days. 

That’s like 20 years in Cat Time. 

Because you know we seldom feed them. 

Just ask them. Lol. 

The morning meetup posse. 

They stand outside the hall door 

And cry for food. 

*gets water gun* 

The Apple Watch counts arm movements

As well as actual steps with distance. 

I think the key is 

Not doing the same thing every night. 

I think I need to change up slightly 

Every 3 days or so. 

Also being tired is good for sleep. 

So melatonin for a few days. 

Then Delta 9 for a few days. 

Then GABA or KavaKava

Mc D. Double Quarter Pounder. 

I only got half of it 

Before it swan dove out of there. 

Dropped and tossed. 

I’m in a strange place. 

Mentally. A tenacious little vibe. 

A little trepidation. Walk carefully. 

Like in those films about bombs 

or storms or zombies 

and how people come out

From the shelters after an attack.  

At first they’re just looking around

Trying to take it all in. 

Like a new baby popping out of a womb. 

This lil dude is like WTF!

Sorry, buddy, you can’t go back in. 

Once the goose is cooked,

You can’t uncool it. Lol. 

Still having protein shakes 

And viola! My ulcers are better. 

I’ve been sweating for a week. 

Like constantly sweating. 

Like you can see it. 

My hair is wet and clothes are damp. 

And look at me. I survived. 

Somehow. 

I’m actually happier now than I’ve been

In a while. But nothing has changed. 

Except for me. I’ve changed. 

rainy day

Old Person Flu Season

Starter Package 

I felt sluggish this morning.  

Like trying to walk through 

Molasses in the Winter. 

People are not always smart 









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I spent years working on

My agoraphobia. Now what? 

My wee bairn 

Two years ago when he was wee. 

Down down do your thing!

Literally my pants fell off. 

Miss Thang