26 December 2010

giving up on the hard way

Started drinking energy drinks last October
After a bout with Swine Flu.
Caught it from a patient.
(The flu, not the Monster!)

It was during my blogging break.
So no archives of the misery.
But I lost a ton of weight, 
so it would have made for a good story!
Well, I liked the Monsters alot.
I could thrive on it, actually. Yay!
I mixed Red Bull or Monster 
with protein powder, and it was Devine.

This is the real deal.
For a caffeine junkie.

Plus, I am a coffee drinker from way back.
From when I was 20 or so.... that's 30 years!

And then, there's Guarana, from Brazil (link)

1/2 a guarana in the morning and 1/2 at 4 pm.
Some days.  A Chemical "tea time."
What is tea time about, if not caffeine!? (link) 

How else did Earl Gray conquer the New World?

Night after night I lay awake in bed,
pondering the origins of the Universe....

Gave up drinking - too many calories.
Not worth it!
Gave up sugar and starch and lots of carbs.
Gave up being a slob.
Opted for the Fit Scene.

Gave up all the stupid shit stuff that got me to this place in life.
The stinking - thinking, and folly of my mid-life crisis.
Gave up being a snob!

Now-a-days, I would never argue with a dude, in a lodge,
in the Grand Canyon, who says I am too heavy to ride a mule.
Especially if I was. And I was.

I don't want to argue with anybody!
'Can't we all just get along?'
 To paraphrase Rodney King.

Gave up my religion - got it back, a wee little bit.
Even did my hair. And got some "girlie" yoga pants.
As in Spandex. And tops to match. As in "Yikes!"
Gave up my identity as a heavy person.
Gave up my long-cherished pseudo death wish.
Couldn't stand the pain. Turns out, I'm not Gothic enough.
In the past 20 months of blogging,
I have given up every single idea that I once cherished.

And really, to give up caffeine makes me feel a little deprived.
And by that, I mean "freaking cranky!"

A pie chart showing my use and tolerance of caffeine

Maybe to go from 600+ mg of caffeine 
a day - to nothing is just wrong. (Too much, I know.)
And I can't do it! Not all at once.
The All-Or-Nothing Craziness Strikes Again.

Maybe just to quit the Monsters is a good start.
And I have cut back to two cups of half decaff a day.
And a cup of sugar-free hot chocolate with a drop
of mint extract and a spoonful of  coconut oil.

Or sugar-free hot chocolate with a drop of cherry!

And take lots of B vitamins and ginseng that Monster has.
Maybe some Taurine.

There's an imaginary line into quitting something
that I can't cross. Or don't want to. Like weight-loss,
I think the real contest is between the ears.

And just an aside:
I didn't want to quit caffeine because I am sick.
I am not sick. It was an experiment to see if
caffeine and cortisol can influence visceral fat.
Those last few pesky pounds.

That, and the $$ I save will fund The Beatles
Anthology.... my weight-loss treat to myself!
Now available on iTunes.

So in that regard, I have been without Monsters for 
almost 3 weeks. Been on the decaff for 3 weeks.
Been off the guarana for a week.
And I drink green tea (yuk) and rooibos tea
and my little caffeine allotment.
About 75 -100 mg a day, tops.

It just seems so lonely and miserable 
when you are on the outside, 
looking in. Like Little Oliver Twist.
I'll be glad when this phase passes.

"Forget the gruel. Got any Java?"

Hope your day is warm and delightful
like a gourd full of Yerba Mate tea!

*Thanks, google-meister for the pic of the flat world with ships sailing off of it! 
And the beatles picture is a picture of a picture that I have.
All the other pics I took (or did) myself, as usual.*


  1. Sigh is right! I tried (and tried, and tried) to give up caffeine and just couldn't do it. (the headaches nearly killed me) But I did cut waaaaaaay back so I sleep much better and am not nearly as cranky, especially in the morning, as I used to be.

    My view is that a small caffeine jump start in the morning is okay but when I start needing a caffeine jump in the afternoon a big red flag is raised and I correct whatever I'm doing wrong-- cuz if I have caffeine in the afternoon, there's no way I'll sleep that night.

    The Beatles Anthology is an excellent incentive to cut back. Great choice, Anne.

    Hope your Christmas was wonderful. It's raining again here but the day was nice.

    xoxo jj

  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

  3. Sorry about the deleted post. Too many mistakes to read with understanding.

    You're doing wonders cutting back on the caffeine etc. Oh dear. Now I feel bad. You've cut back on coffee and I got my coffee grinder out again today. But my at home coffee is pretty tame. 2 tbsp in a 600ml plunger. I could feel it for hours. I've been almost coffee free for more than a month but I miss it. I love the taste. Other drinks get boring after a while. Plus I needed a fix as trying to do too many things at once today.

    I've had a few sugar hits over the last two days, what with pavlova and testing my baking but I'm really over sugar. Sweet doesn't taste so great right now. *Cheering* Long may it last.

  4. As I sip my first mug of Rocket Fuel at 5:30 this morning, while holding my Sugar Free Red Bull large size in the other hand I feel your pain. That is all I can do. Take the girl, dont take the caffeine....Ever... XXooo

  5. Ooops, now I feel a bit badly about encouraging you to give up the caffeine. If it's dear to you and doesn't make you "sick," then cut back some, as you so fabulously have, and see if it affects your loss of visceral fat over a period of time.

    That said, once caffeine is out of you system for a relatively short while, I can attest (as a former caffeine-dependent person) that you won't miss it at all, won't feel deprived, will even find decaf coffees and teas that taste great.

    The buzz that I used to get from my quad lattes twice a day? Well, sometimes I confused the buzz with creative energy, but after a couple of months I realized I was actually way more creative and more productive without the buzz.

    However you go with this, Anne, you have my deepest respect for all that you do to understand and continue your weight and visceral fat loss.

  6. man.
    I can relinquish so so so much EXCEPT my morning cup.
    which all points to the fact I should try and see :)

  7. Wow, I admire you, lady!! Very wise not to do this cold turkey, but it's definitely good to find a comfortable place way south of 600+ mg. a day. Like everything else you've done up to this point, you'll find the right place for you.

    Hope you have a great day...God bless us everyone!

  8. Over the course of the last two years, I've given up coffee completely three times... both of which lasted only about two weeks.

    I was obsessed with eating a "clean" diet, which meant zero caffeine. First, I gave up pop (yes, I'm from the Midwest -- soda, if you prefer) -- still off that. Then, I decided to get rid of the morning Joe. I went to green tea, but it's just not the same.

    Then, I did decaf for a while. Again, not the same. Now, I just drink caffeine in the mornings. I brew Starbucks at home... heavy duty, bold, strong coffee. I think it's a good balance.

  9. I gave up caffeine in college (many years ago) when it finally occurred to me that it was the reason I had trouble falling asleep at night! My drink objective was to think about switching my tasty decaf teas for the healthy green stuff. My husband drinks that Yerba Matte and to me it smells like tobacco. Ugh.

  10. PLEASE sir, Can I have some more? I applaud you for the effort , the stamina, the surrender. But in my heart of hearts...It seems wrong. Caffeine has been circulating through you for a lifetime..less is great but it's now a key component of your makeup. I would committ to 15 extra minutes of exercise just for a good cup of Joe.

  11. I have always avoided caffeine like the plague. In my heavier days it would cause anxiety and a racing heart to indulge in caffeine. Now though, I have added a little back into my plan by way of tea flavored water mix. It isn't real tea but contains tea and therefore has a bit of caffeine. It seems to have the affect of increasing the efforts of my Ritalin, which was beginning to fade after all this time. I am finding that on the days when I add a bit of caffeine in my water, I am more productive. Funny though, that I am no longer getting the racing heart or anxiety. It must be that I'm getting just a small amount.

  12. Yes - perhaps my Science Project
    with me as the Guinea Pig
    might not be the raging success
    I thought it would be.
    At least the migraines are gone.
    But no one can say I didn't try!

  13. I gave up caffeinated soft drinks 15 years ago because they made my heart race. But I never gave up my morning coffee. It gets me started on a good note. Now I sometimes have a cup of 1/2 and 1/2 with friends in the late afternoons. But large jolts of caffeine and me do not mix. One day I had a cup of real coffee with those friends. 30 minutes later my hands were shaking. Yes, it's that bad.

  14. I read this while brewing my only daily allotment of caffeine. two cups tops. Remember way back when in the now deleted old blog of mine, I had that pesky sleep problem? Before being diagnosed with sleep apnea I was consuming massive quantities of caffeine to get through the day. Withdrawals weren't pleasant, but I did it and you can too.

  15. Maybe in women the visceral fat isn't as unhealthy as we have been led to believe. The more I study scientific research, the more I see its flaws and the cultural/political/economic pressures that influence outcomes and perceptions.

    I suggest: keep on experimenting to see what makes you feel fabulous over the long term. Perhaps super-patience (is that an actual virtue? LOL), in the form of acceptance+time+loving care is required during the last long haul of fat riddage. :)

    Take care sweet girl! You're a champ and a cheerleader.

    Yes, today I'm in a silly, happy mood in spite of life's troubles. :)


  16. wow! Im glad you're not going cold turkey anymore either. It sounds like a horrible punishment. Cutting down for sure; just dont cut yourself down in the process haha! Hope you find a nice happy medium on the intake--and that you feel LOADS better today!

  17. Caffeine...looks like we all have our love affair stories to share with that one. I thought I was the one and only.

    I once gave up coffee for an entire year. So proud was I of my disciplined choice. I even fancied the idea that I conquered the evil spell of Juan Valdez. But no. I hit the one year mark of no coffee and the very next day I starting making my brew extra strong and I have never looked back.

    I have made peace with my resistance. So my new strategy is to just admit with all honesty that I am not ready yet but that I will be one day
    and I will patiently wait and not judge this weakness. I make a few adjustments here and there. I entertain the idea of never again but I can feel in my heart of hearts I am still not sincere. I shall wait. I know its been done. I am confident that my day will come. And when it does it won't be a struggle but a simple choice of I'm ready now.

    Keeping the Faith with you.
    Love you more than you know.

  18. I like my coffee, I don't do Monsters or Guarana pills, just my morning coffee and a few diet cokes on occassion,

    but good luck with this quest, I am sure you will be sleeping better :)

  19. Good luck with this! You have made so many changes I have no doubt you will change this, as well, as long as you desire it. FTR, I love yerba mate in the morning too!

  20. Might be worth looking into.
    Yerba Mate - not cold turkeys!

  21. Never heard of yerba mate so looked it up, interesting. I say go with what works best for you without torture. You did have me looking some stuff up and it seems caffeine could impair healing so I'm thinking maybe I should be lowering my intake of caffeine also before surgery. I seem to go through stages with more then less. Guess I need to go with less these days. So starting after this current pot of tea I will be going decaf. Thanks for keeping me thinking. Hope you're having a better day today. This all is about enjoying our lives and finding happiness. *hugs*

  22. To make green tea 100 times better - let it cool down a bit and add freshly squeezed lemon juice. Half a lemon per 1 to 2 cups.

    I've been thinking about this post all day. It's tough, deciding where that line stands. But, you know, you make the line and it's in your power to change it, too. Draw it where it's comfortable at the moment. You can change your mind along the way, move it up or down to keep the comfort level satisfactory.

    Getting rid of the extra fat is important for your physical health, but not feeling deprived is as important for your emotional health.

    Balance is the key. If only finding the balance was not that damn hard. Sigh. *hugs*

  23. Truer words were never blogged!
    It is about balance and health, and being happy.....
    not about numbers on the scale, or size on the label.

  24. I feel you on the caffeine. I really do. I'm proud of you.

  25. One of the most beautiful posts I've ever read, Anne. I trust that you are doing the best thing for your health.


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