08 August 2010

a nice day to start...again

Just doesn't make any sense.

I overslept today!
(Not really - this is a story.
Work with me, here!)
I figured this:
"Since I've already messed up and over-slept,
I will just stay in bed. All day."

Then I got up. Cuz I was hungry.
So I ate. Whatever. 100 cakes.
(Not really - just a story - remember?)
So I told myself this:
"Since I've already messed up and had a cake,
I will just eat cake. All day."

Well that didn't last too long.
Pretty soon I figured I'd best go to work.
Beats looking for a new job, right?

So I got dressed and went down stairs.
But I forgot something.
So I went back up the stairs.
Then back down. Only to find I forgot something else.
So I came up with this stroke of genius:
"Since I've already messed up, and done this "stair thang,"
I am just going to keep going up and down the stairs. All day."
Well, that evidently only works for FUN things.
This going up and down all day sucks! Hard work, that!

So I got in the car. Driving....
Hit a red light. I wanted green! 
Grrrr. Grrrreen!
I wanted all the lights to be green, and stay green.
Even before I left out. No waiting today.
Not for me. Late as I am?

In fact, I'm not going anywhere until all the lights are green -
And stay green... but just on my side, that is!

So I decided to show "them."
Whoever "they" are.
So I turned off the ignition, and sat there.
Stuck like chuck. Right at the light.

Thought I: "You lousy fatherless child! Bastid!
You want me to stop? I'll show you *stop!*
I've got your *stop* right here."

Well, that ends up sucking, too. Cus the traffic was heavy.
And the car was hot, and I just wanted things to go ok.
And I really don't need this right now. 
(Insert whimper here!)
All I need is this Thermos. 
And this stool. And this ping pong paddle.

Sheesh -  I can't even talk right now...
I can't think... What was I even thinking?
I don't know... My words don't sound right.

So I'm going to only use Igpay Atin-lay from now on-ay.
(Pig Latin)
Because if you can't understand-ay me-ay
Why do I try-ay!?
I mean "I-tray"!
Eventually we arrive at the "outcome of this strange religion..."
That is the story of what happens 
when "fuzzy logic"  turns into "moldy logic."
At least for me. 
Time to think there might be a better way-ay?
Every moment is a chance to start over.
Errors call for correction.... not punishment!

YouTube video
"The Jerk"
Hope your day is wonderful - ay!


  1. That clown roomis freaky. I am not freaked by clowns as some people are, but that room, disturbing.

  2. ...and a rear end thermometer too!

  3. Uk-yay, at-thay own-clay oom-ray as-ray isgusting-day!!!


    (as kids we got the biggest kick talking in pig latin, thinking we had some big secret, LOL! Your post really tickled me.)

  4. Is that really mold on those walls? Where did you find that picture? We need to call 911 for an intervention!

    Ok side tracked by the mold thing so I don't want to forget to vote this as one of your best posts ever!

    Ending with Steve Martin priceless. All I need; yes, laughter is all I really need. Thank you for my daily dose.

  5. That clown room is kind of freaking me out!!

  6. Way cool view of the backward words. I remember Steve wanting his green thermos or is that from something else?

  7. I found that moldy clown room picture about 10 years ago online.
    Whilst researching black mold.
    It was, and is disgusting. Yuk!

  8. 10 years ago!!! ...those could be solid black walls by now or have crumbled to the ground.

  9. Right!
    Hopefully they tore it down right after they documented it!
    This was the "deadly mold" Stachybotrys!

  10. every moment is a moment to start over, I am going to remember that all week!! You gave me some ponderings for the week Anne :)

  11. I like that, don't try to fix the past...fix the moment, because that is really all you have.

    Have a wonderful week!

  12. Fabulous blog!

    All or nothing thinking really is a bit warped when you put it in any real life situation.

  13. Jeeeest!
    You remind me of a true story -
    my buds and me long ago
    speaking Op English on the bus
    surely everyone will think
    we are foreigners (giggle)
    and be impressed (giggle, titter)!

    Dop yopu thopink thopat yopu copuld lopearn Openglopish? Opif yopu spopeek opit ropealopy fopast, opit sopounds sopo copool!!!! Gopet opit?

  14. Gotop Itop!

  15. "Errors call for correction...not punishment." Truer words were never written.

  16. I loved the nuances and turns in your story. Wonderful. :D


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