05 November 2010

cookie whisperer

Creepy Intro Music Here
And whistling wind....


Lions, Tigers, Carbs
All this junk - this candy, and so-called food!
Cookies, cakes, pies, omg!

What is it trying to tell us?


What was that whispering sound?
Did you hear that, or is it just me?

All this drinking, and eating, and working out -
and things that make no sense at all.
Especially if you do them all at the same time!

They said what?


They said I have a big WHAT?


Oh, ok! Sorry - it's not easy to understand
what you're saying.... I think I got it now....

They said that I'll have to figure out for myself??
(Some help you are, Cookie Whisperer!)
Sheesh - thanks alot!

The Cookie Whisperer said the "lost souls" are Earth-Bound
because they have some unfinished business here.
And they are stuck here until they solve it!
We want to dump our fatty bodies and move around freely.
Free from the grave, and from the gravy!

Well, let's see.
Better get to solving!

Eat Fresh.
Eat Raw.
Eat Nothing.
Eat 6 times a day.
Eat anything you want, and come back and tell me how that's working for ya.

Hurry up.
Slow down.

Maybe it's a virus. From outer space.
(Yeah - that's it - a virus!)
It causes people to gain weight that they can not lose.
Or maybe it's genetic. A disease without a cure.


Maybe it's more Rational:
Low Frustration Tolerance
Problem Solving
Alphabet soup of every diagnosis
Addiction? Insanity? 
Is Morbid Obesity a Morbid "Death Wish?"
Wow - looks like we took a wrong turn somewhere -
Such angst!


OK, ok!
Eat less - Move more.
True dat! But it's not that easy.
Or we would all be thin as proverbial rails 
and everyone would live 500 years.
Or maybe forever. 

On the other hand, it's not that hard.
Simple, but not easy.

Winking smile
"Boo y'all!"


  1. Did I get a little quote at the end ???

  2. They said you have a BIG heart :)

  3. Got called away for work - can't blog all day as planned!
    They need a Spanish Speaking Nurse....
    So - Off I go! Have a great day!

  4. All I know is that the slowest person is usually the one eaten (or was that "eating"?) - so I need to lose weight to stay out of the predator's reach.

  5. Thin as rails, huh. Being active and eating sensibly and not everything in sight would work. There are so many different claims to good health. For me, it me doing what works for me and high fiving the other ways for other folks.

  6. Yup we all need to figure it out for ourselves, but I had a good chuckle at your post--you read and hear SO MANY things and theories about why people are fat. Its an onslaught of information and mis-information to be sure!
    Hasta lavista baby!

  7. "Free from the grave, and from the gravy!"

    Lordy, that's good.

  8. I love this. The suspense you build in the wine aisle is wow. You're so spectacularly creative.

  9. Psssst, I get the impression you have a tire going flat. Better pull over and do some puch ups, you'll feel better. Move more indeed!

    Have a Great weekend!

  10. That picture of you, with the green.. I love it !!!

  11. I always knew it was dem durn aliens! Anal probes cause fat retention!

  12. Ha ha ha... it's probably all of that... and none of that. In the end, it probably doesn't matter too much "why", but rather what we DO about it.

    Fun post. :-)

  13. oh no
    not the cookie whisperer
    be still my heart

    speaking of which
    good to know about yours
    I have skipped beats too
    maybe that will go away
    as for you

    30 is a good number
    and you did look mighty fine
    30 is about where I'm at
    yeah, it feels great
    like I'm a beauty queen
    or something

    oh sorry
    that's your next post
    I'm catching up
    reading all
    getting confused

    will cookie abstinence
    help with that too

    anyway, cookie whisperer
    alphabet soup of every diagnosis
    at least we know
    it's not how nature intends us

    and what of that
    what good to know
    oh I give up
    it's all good

  14. I think I like the comments on the blogs as much as I like the blogs!
    These people are great and make sense with what they say. I feel like a blundering baby by comparion. Maybe as I pick up speed, on the blogging, I can write better comments on other people's blogs!
    Cookie whisperer. Lol!


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