30 May 2009

fast times

why call it a "fast" when it feels so "slow"?

These days I am trying to "slow my roll" (so to speak!) and not live in such a hurry.   On days that I practice my intermittent fasting, I found an old feeling has returned to my days.  Profound boredom!

Very long slow days.  Days that don't feel like time is passing at all.  

Days that were once filled with drive-thru meals, and cokes. Eating, shopping or cleaning up after eating.  And planning.  Always something...

Intermittent fasting has shown me that I had a much deeper food-centered life than I once thought.  I feel lonesome, like I just lost my best friend.  It's like a major project has reached completion.  Now what can I do with my time?  Does eating cover up this boredom?

Quick - dash off to work! Run to the store! Eat fast!  Fast food!   It's too much and not enough.

The intermittent water fasting is going just fine.  

I have had absolutely no physical hunger whatsoever!  Maybe a hunger for "something else."

Eating is something we all do, so in a way it connects us all.  And to voluntarily restrict my food intake, either by fasting or just cutting way back, I sometimes feel as though I  "left the fold."   There are so many ways to connect to people; food is just one.   Maybe food became an "idol" and the human connection became nothing but a means.  

Intermittent water fasting is not for everyone, but it is for me, at least for now.  Even on days when I don't do it perfectly, the results are still there. Even with the occasional bout of boredom and hunger.

6 comments:

  1. I think this is a realization that comes to many who stop participating in addictive and/or compulsive behavior.

    It's kind of like when a drug addict stops using. They wonder: What do I do for fun now? Who can I hang out with now? Why do the everyday pleasures of life seem so ordinary/dull?

    When I think of it in that way, it can be quite depressing. Thinking of all the time and energy lost to a self-destructive activity isn't very productive. Instead, I try to focus on all the time I'll have now ... now that my life doesn't resolve around unhealthy foods.

    Just my two pennies worth ...

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  2. Two pennies but invaluable, really. I once thought that a "diet" would be easy. I've done it many times before. But this time I have found these "root " issues that I didn't even know I had. I'm excited about it so far; it's very freeing. I'm practicing watching my thoughts and reactions to every day boring stuff! Thanks for all your great comments, Harry.

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  3. I think we all need much less food than our brains tell us we need.

    Nice post.

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  4. Jack -- I think you are right. MUCH less. Thanks for reading!

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  5. this post tweeked my memories of those first few weeks/months. it did feel empty to have all those hours free of food n food related activities. and man o' man should you try to get a social engagement set up that doesnt involve food. really people just having something to do with they're hands while they socialize. i still drink coffee, so i take coffee dates. ive picked up a couple of hobbies too. if you should stay on a fasting regimen long term, you'll find you adapt nicely. food just isnt a part of most of my days now. and when i do an occasional 12pm fast break, its a special treat. at least once a weekend i "celebrate" with brunch. :)

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  6. You have a lot of experience with IF. I am new to it, but adapting nicely. And you're right about the social thing. Amazing!

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