another "new" day

It's starting to look like home again

Sugar free flavorings - not booze!

Protein powder in many flavors

They take up alot of room

Red tea, green tea, Monster by the case

A "blooming onion," eh?

Didn't eat it all - meh!

New kicks 

Whenever I gather more than a few somatic complaints, or projections,

I have learned that "I am never upset for the reason I think."

So I try to "look inside" and go beyond the symptoms,

Behind the petty grievances, and figure out what is really going on.

This is the 5 year anniversary of friend of mine's suicide.

I found out later she tried to call me several times that night,

But I didn't get the calls...

Probably why jumbled (or absent) communication bothers me, even to this day.

I found her picture in a box, tonight when I was unpacking.

I'd taken them down this last spring, when I started blogging! 

I figured it was time to practice the wisdom of forgiving myself,

And the zen-ish art of "moving on." 

It's like I was making a decision in the present moment

To give more importance to the (non-existant) past,

Or the (equally non-existant) future,

Rather than to the present/now, which is all the time there really is.

But not "moving on" in a frantic, desperate way...not anger or fear-based.

Just more gentle, and kind, and even loving.

Like "moving toward" something, instead of "running from" something.

Whatever happened in the past - now it calls for healing and understanding.

Monster w/ protein

Snack pack of peanuts - one hot, one regular

Coffee w/sf hot choc, water - the usual suspects

2nd monster w/protein - I perked up "like a daisy!"

anne h said...

The quote is from "A Course In Miracles," Which I have studied for years, Until 6 months ago, when I all but stopped reading. So now, I've re-examined if it makes sense to me, and it does! In fact, it's sometimes the ONLY thing that does!

APRIL 3, 2010 4:32 AM 

a box of technology

Funny. What ya can't wait for today,

Sometimes goes in a box tomorrow....

 

Made a shopping list for Home Depot, and stuck to it 100%

Before: bathroom caulk

After: much better!

Lots of preparation and attention to detail.

Just like in foodie stuff and weight-loss.

And you always get a "do-over" if you mess up.

Microwave on top of the Fridge works well

if you don't use it alot...which I don't

BioFreeze by the gallon, anyone?

Not much sleep going on these days.

Got up and did a wee little bit of unpacking.

A worried look, perhaps? *sigh*

Not quite the sheer feeling of impending doom 

that I've had before. Just a vague angst.

Monster w/protein

Ham and cheese roll-up

Atkins bar - they came in the mail!

An Atkins bar free promo! (click the link)

1/2 grilled chicken breast -

A neighbor gave it to me since I was

"quote unquote" too busy to cook today!

Advil for dinner. Too busy, indeed!

gym class dropout

The treadmill, weight bench and I have a new home!

Two strapping young dudes made quick work of the moving process.

The rest is just "fill in the gaps."

The end of an era *sniff*

At this old apartment, I used to dash in, as fast as I could,

to check my email and comments on my previous blog...

And talk, talk, talk, on the phone for hours...

Farewell, cable - we barely knew ye!

d/c the cable for a while

to concentrate better on my true "recovery."

I take my weight-loss (and subsequent issues) seriously

-- no less so than if I were in recovery from something --

Because I am!

These are the WORST earbuds - I can't hear anything!

Oh wait - they are ear PLUGS! :D

Lunch at Jack In The Box for the movers and me.

Grilled chicken salad, please!

If it stands still, paint it.  If it moves, salute it.

(At least that's what they say in the Army!)

Still plenty to do!

I am the kind of person that would be good to have on a major project.

I have the opposite of ADD - I can stay focused for hours!

Marathon sessions are my forte! I'm just now hitting my stride.

Monster w/protein, of course, you say!

Only half of the salad - it tasted "salty" to me

Coffee w/sf hot chocolate  - another habit, I'd say!

Half an Atkins bar I found under the couch when I moved...

Just kidding! I ate all of it, not half of it.

But I really just unwrapped it, fresh from the box!

Pul-ease!

The weather is so wonderfully perfect.

They say Spring only lasts about 2 weeks here in Dallas...

Then it goes right from "windows open" to "air conditioning."

I fell asleep on the memory foam topper - still in my clothes!

Now that is tired! But only after about 18 hours of physical work.

Must be the full moon.